Matrimony has been considered by many hopeful newly weds as the peak of earthly bliss,an accomplishment that destiny and fate have made a reality.The promise of endless dreams to be fulfilled seems ripe and each spouse is apparently blinded to the other's negative character traits,which traits are bound to manifest in the later stages of marriage when bitterness and frustration have taken root. Initially life seems so full of promises,colourful dreams that one is determined to share with a loved one. Every sigh is so utterly sweet and each expelled breath is a thank you prayer to the divine for smiling down on one with such endless blessings. Marriage here is a heavenly gift that many are willing to embrace.
Why,one wonders does this high praise of marriage diminish to sarcasm and bitter ridicule?.The reasons are varied and diverse,ranging from character and personality problems to external influences like the environment.First and foremost, it is imperative to recognise the fact that weaknesses are part and parcel of human nature.However tolerating the weaknesses of another individual for the rest of one's lifetime is not amusing. Weaknesses such as snoring,lack of hygiene and an absolutely horrid sense of style are most repulsive to women.These particular weaknesses might not have been discovered considering the trend of marriages today where prolonged courtship is practically considered outdated worsened by the mentality that one is capable of identifying a life partner at first glance.Jumping into a marriage and then being forced to endure animalish noises in the dead of night is cxapable of breeding animosity in marriage,which animosity might have been avoided if such trait had been reveald during the delicate stages of courtship.Following the concept of the johari window, we identify the fact that there are certain human traits that a particular individual might not be aware of and these are only brought to light in certain extreme conditions or circumstances.Supposing the traits are negative the reaction of the spouse will be a combination of shock and incredulity,a certain feeling of betrayal at the fact that so basic a trait had been so carefully maskd.In the end name calling becomes the order of the day with spouse branding the other a hypocrite and a pretender.
What then is the remedy for so precarious a situation? Simple as it may seem the word stands firm and solid.Tolerance. A human virtue that has more often than not has been sidestepped and treated as irrelevant in dealing with conflict.Yet the truth still stands.If tolerance as a virtue is embraced and frequently considered as an important part of our lives we will surely be able to rise above such trivalities and other smaller problems in life.