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Rekindle from the slumbers of a departed partner

deceased partner, break up, high self esteem, living after partner has departed

Depression is a weakness a person chooses to have. Scientifically, there are certain genes in our body which on interacting with the environmental factors like stress or grief (these may include the death of a family member or friend, any loss of a relationship, change in financial status, health problems, loss of self-esteem, or changes which cause an in breakup of a relationship) causes chemical imbalance in the brain. Consequently, there are mood changes, negative thinking, appetite changes, insomnia, loss of self esteem, withdrawn behavior and feelings of sadness, loneliness, worthlessness and hopelessness. To get over these situational depressions, there are medicines and professional help but nobody can prove to be more effective in helping you than yourself.

When you experience mood changes or intensity of negative feelings, try to locate the sources of stress or depression. Examine your feelings in relation to situations. Most importantly, start meditating, exercising and be assertive than passive. Do not expect perfection from yourself or from others. Nobody is perfect.

One of the many reasons of depression is departure from the partner either after his death or after a breakup. There may be a short term or a long term depression but an individual has the ability to cope up with it although the time taken to cope may vary with the intensity of victimization.

Often people feel guilty about being alive after the partners death but don’t you think your partner always wanted you to be happy and wouldn’t he want you to get on with your life with another person the way you lived with him. And don’t you think you have spared your partner the suffering of loosing his beloved. This very thought itself will make you feel genuinely content about your partners death.

Some people feel that love is once in a lifetime phenomena. The feeling that you wont be able to love anybody else the way you loved your partner may get you in a comparison trap. Sometimes, comparison is no better than a sin. Instead of the way you loved your deceased/ departed partner, you can love someone else in a different way. And this world is full of people looking for a person like you. You are unique and nobody else can measure up.

After a breakup of a long term relationship, many people end up feeling used and abused. You are hurt and the mistrust drowns you in a deepening sea of melancholy. There is often an identity crisis and the victim feels afraid to meet new people, make new relationships and love again. The trauma of the past becomes a big mental block and tries to doom the future. There maybe numerous reasons to get sad at,so why not cherish the beautiful moments life has offered and instead, make happiness a trend.

What you do when while walking, you suddenly trip or fall down? Don’t you rise and walk again, this time more carefully. Life is not about rising, its all about rising every time you fall. Each of us is already a whole person, a person capable of responding to new challenges in new ways. So giveaway the feelings of guilt, rejection and hurt with a new perception, a new transformation of being a competent whole individual who is on a mission to rise. As you do this, your self esteem will rise and you will meet new people, embrace new relationships. Have your own pace and the fears of commitment and insecurity will fade gradually.

Give yourself a chance to love yourself for once and the life will love you.
Published: 2006-10-21
Author: Apurva Dhiman

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I am a total addict to writing and just believe in sharing all that i know and thats why i am here...

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