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Understanding True Love



A few days back I read in the newspaper that a husband was so

much in love with his wife that he kept her under house arrest for

fifteen years. During these years he did not allow her to step out of

the house, he neither allowed her to wear new clothes nor allowed her

to mix with their own relatives. The husband was worried that the wife

might fall for someone else and might desert him. True love doesn't

keep loved one in captivity. True love never forces itself upon other

by saying, "I am in love with you so even you have to love me". That

person's ego exercises such coercion.

Genuine love never expects anything. It does not demand, " I have

done these things for you. Hence you have to do so and so things for

me." This demand is a type of give and take. An account of each and

every good deed done is kept and then it is insisted that he/she return

those favors. This persistence has no place in the genuine love. When

you love someone, you must do everything that makes him/her happy. When

you look at his/her delighted face, you feel contented.

Do not put any conditions in love. Do not put a prerequisite

like" He loves me only if he buys me diamonds." Many couples spend

their entire lives in a loveless relationship. God does not bless each

with true love. God has selected only you. It means that you are so


If we are ourselves not ready to give in ourselves totally then

what is the point in seeking real love? If we intend to keep love in

rules and regulations then why to pray to god for it?

Let the days be of spring or let it be a stormy night, love means

only giving. Pleasure and pain are parts of life. The tiny seedling of

love that began growing in happy days, one should not uproot it if

difficulties arise. Happy days pass fast but that is real love that

stands with the loved one during sorrow.

Any disaster can fall. It can be loved one losing a limb in an

accident or he/she getting fired from the job or anything else. He/she

is already sad. Do not leave him/her in this grief. Maybe you may have

to work hard. Maybe you may have to change your easy life style but

miseries will bring you closer than the happiness.

There is no place for jealousy and hatred in true love. Trust

him/her totally. Nobody knows if there is life after death. No one can

guarantee the next life. Whatever we have is in this life. This is the

only golden chance we have got. Let's not waste it. So many days we

have been thinking, "I love him/her but he/she does not love me."

Let's change the way we think. Let's start thinking this way, "He/she

also loves me with heart and soul but his/her way of expressing is

different than what I expect from him/her."

From today let's change our definition of real love. Let's do

away with all the rules that we have laid down for true love. Let's

stop keeping account of what we do for the loved one. Let's stop

expecting the loved one to balance this balance sheet of chores. If we

do this, then our life will be blissfully happy………no doubt about it.
Published: 2006-05-23
Author: Sanyukta Chitnis

About the author or the publisher
Sanyukta Chitnis is a freelance writer. She can be contacted at

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